Saturday, December 8, 2012

Our Little (Okay Big) Surprise!

I've been waiting to write this blog post since the fall. I almost spilled nearly a half dozen times. So for those that do not know me in the outside- blogger- world and/or not on my Facebook....I am pregnant, due in May 2013.  After everything we went through to have our Son, we get our second child the easy/old fashioned way.  In short, we just got lucky.  Here's the story:
My Mom had come to visit us for my birthday at the end of August/very beginning of September. The only thing "off" about me at the time was my ferocious appetite. I couldn't get enough to eat and...while that is just not usually how I am. I seldom eat seconds and often have to be reminded to eat. A few days after she left was when it finally hit me that I might actually be pregnant. I realized I was "late" and I never am or have been. I still wasn't convinced though. I've seen so many disappointing negative pregnancy tests over the past 3 or 4 years, that I was way too scared. Finally one Sunday, I was praying at Mass when emotion suddenly overcame me as I began thinking of my Grandparents never getting to meet my kids. I actually cried in church. Somehow that feeling, as cheesy as it may seem, was my clue that I must be pregnant & needed to take a home test.  Obviously it was positive & so was the one the next day & then the subsequent blood draw confirmed it all. My first emotion was elation. I had written in my private journal just a few months prior that I was hoping God would give me another miracle in this way. My second & continued emotion was fear. This pregnancy terrifies me. It's too "normal" so to speak. There were no fertility drugs or RE appointments. There's no IVF coordinator walking me through it all. It's taking some time, but I am very happy. It's just very different from my son. It's like I have to allow myself permission to be happy about it too. 
Now for a picture of my cutie.

11/1/2012: 12 weeks. Next u/s at 19 weeks.
Thanks for reading along my friends. I'll be back soon.